Open Letters to Adoptees
Our Haiku Collection
On January 14th, 1999 I found my daughter. We were separated for almost 34 years. She was born on my 18th birthday, April 14th, 1965. I never forgot her from the day I had to walk away from her and I knew that one day I would try and find her, if I was given the chance.
I know it's hard for an adoptee to fathom that a Mother could give away her own child and still profess that she loves that child. But that is exactly how it was for teenage unwed mothers, who felt that they had no choice in the adoption decision. We were told by our parents and our ministers that adoption was our only option, because we would want what was best for our child. That our child needs a Mother and a Father, in a secure home and we were not fit or able to raise our kids on our own. Don't think that because your firstmother didn't search for you that she didn't want to. Most Firstmothers think that they do not have a right to search, but would welcome being found and hoped that one day their child would knock on their door or ring their phone.
If you don't search you could be passing up a chance of a lifetime. Knowing is always better than not knowing. My daughter and I get closer each day as we make great memories together. Even though I am not the Mother that grew in her heart, I am the Mother that she now acknowledges as her Firstmother, and she says that she loves me deeply. Never assume anything. If you want to know the answer, ask the question. Feel free to write to me if you want.
original artwork © ytleistcreswell